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Letter’s home. Reading the fine print. What’s the science behind group development?
As we enter the thrid week of camp letters have been going back and forth between family members, friends and campers. (Remember letters? They require paper and stamps) As a parent reading the letter it can be challenging to put the comments in perspective. What is happening at camp? How is my daughter doing in her cabin group? What is she learning? Does she miss me?
At Runoia, camp is about community and working to find Harmony in that community. There are many community groups to be a part of at camp: Shack or cabin group which is the most significant; table group at meals; swim class; group for overnight trips; organically formed group of friends and even in each activity class. How is it that these communities are formed? And how might that be reflected in letters home?
The staff at Runoia work hard to facilitate these shack groups and it is during this second week of camp that the community really starts to take shape and the letters home are likely to reflect this growth. The staff work to be attentive to the individual campers and helping them achieve goals. Staff are trained to intervene if necessary and resolve any conflict. Campers at this point have a good sense of their role among the group, which allows for this community to settle.
Did you know there is science behind this growth?
Meet Bruce Tuckman who Identified the Stages of Developmental Sequence in Small Groups. Tuckman originally said there are 3 stages of development:
He later added a 4th: Performing And then a 5th: Adjourning (or Mourning)
Forming: In this stage, most group members are positive and polite. Some are anxious, as they aren’t sure what the camp experience will become. Others are simply excited about the choices they will make, the independence they have and the activities they will take.
Parents might be getting letters that tell of the new activities the girls are doing. Letters might report on specific bunkmates or cabin mates with both favorable and unfavorable reports. This is normal. If as a parent, you receive information that has you concerned about your daughter’s experience, contact a director. Often campers write of isolated feelings or incidents, which soon transform into the Norming Stage.
Storming: Next, the group moves into the storming phase, where campers start to push against the boundaries established in the forming stage. Storming often starts where there is a conflict between campers, and they may become frustrated. It is in this stage that campers are defining their roles and working to settle in.
Letters might be shorter and have seemingly disjointed context. Commonly you read of comments about other campers and less so about personal growth. i.e “I like playing Gaga with Lizzie” followed by “I don’t like swimming, the water is cold”. These are normal observations and feelings your daughter has as she finds her way in the community.
Norming: Gradually, the group moves into the norming stage. This is when community members start to resolve their differences, appreciate each other’s strengths.
Now that campers know one another better, they may socialize together, and they are able to ask one another for help
There is often a prolonged overlap between storming and norming, because, as new tasks come up, the team may lapse back into behavior from the storming stage.
Letters home might have some varying reports based upon where the camper is in the process. These letters report more about friendships, more about the activities and routines at camp because camp has become a place of now understood routines, i.e“yesterday I went on the zip line with Amanda and during rest hour I went tubing with Kia”
Performing: The team reaches the performing stage, when the girls can work together and they really feel the harmony of living together.
It feels easy to be part of the team at this stage. Their morning chores are a routine, and they help each other.
Just as the camp day has a routine to it, letters are likely to flow and have more of a narrative to them.
Adjourning: Many groups will reach this stage eventually, however, leaders can’t control the pace at which the group develops. Shack groups may never get to this point because they are at camp for a fixed, fairly short, time limit.
Having made a new routine at camp, many campers find it challenging to transition OUT of camp. This is particularly hard if they are transitioning TO something new: Some campers’ families are moving while they are at camp such as: parents going through divorce; a pet dies; a new puppy joins the family; or an older sibling goes off to college.
Allow time for this transition. Ask about camp and its traditions and its routines. Try to find similarity in the two settings: camp and home because camp has been home for a few weeks.
In your letters to campers, send information about your routines and compare it to camp. Are you doing morning chores? Are you making decisions? Having interactions with friends? Learning new skills? Share some challenges?
During this week two of camp, you can expect the girls to be transitioning from Storming into the Performing stage of development.
Camp life offers so many chances for growth. As a parent recognize the stages that every group goes through and realize this is part of your daughter’s experience as part of the camp community. Their growth leads to the Harmony of Runoia.
We abhor the “mourning” phase… it’s coming right up as we wrap up our 1st session this week.
Camp Runoia has helped make me who I am today. Runoia has taught me many life lessons, especially how to adjust to change in my life. Before camp, I had never been away from my parents. Although it was extremely hard for me being away from my family my first year, Pam and the staff handled themselves great, always being there for me when I was feeling homesick. The second and third year, I had a fantastic time, and had started to learn how to adjust to the change of not being with my family. Now, fast forward to college. I am from Pennsylvania and because Camp Runoia taught me to be an independent woman, I was able to go to the University of Maine. Here at the University of Maine, I met my now fiancé, John and are now settling in the Portland, Maine region. I would never have been able to go to college far away from my parents, if I had not been to Runoia. Camp Runoia has helped me become a strong independent woman. I am so grateful for my time at Runoia, and feel that sending me to Runoia was the greatest gift they ever gave me, for at Runoia I learned so many life lessons. I really believe I would not have the life I have today without Camp Runoia. Anastasia Kerner
Why Camp?
How many of you went to camp when you were younger? What did you do? Who did you meet? Or maybe, what did you learn? Now imagine if you didn’t have those amazing summers filled these opportunities.
I attended an all girls summer camp in Belgrade Lakes, Maine for 8 years as a camper. In less than a month I will be heading back to Camp Runoia for my third year as a counselor for a total of 11 summers overall. Camp had an extreme impact on my life and I can see it having the same impact on my younger campers.
Will your child go to camp? I hope to persuade all of you to understand that kids need camp even more than before to receive a sense of independence connecting with nature, and learning life long skills in a safe and kid friendly environment that can really help them thrive and succeed in their lives.
Unlike in the school setting where we had to learn what was mandatory and what was required to pass. Camp gave some of us our first taste of independence. Camp allows kids to choose activities they want to do. I remember I had a huge passion for sailing. While I know my mom would have wanted me to kayak all day or go on hikes, I choose to sail everyday. From a radio podcast done by CNN by a senior executive producer Michael Schuler, Schuler spoke with a summer camp advocate, physiologist and school consultant Michael Thompson about summer camps. Thompson explained camp as, “the closet thing to Hogwarts that kids are likely to get. All of children’s literature knows that the adventures only begin when you’re away from your parents. Every great children’s story is driven by the child being away from parents, experiencing things on their own.” Later in the podcast, Thompson summarizers how kids gain independence and how camp can be the place to start that journey to independence he says, “Your parent has to open the door and let you walk out and find independence, experience it and become comfortable with it.” Camp gives you theses independence experiences from even a young age and can help you when you start looking for colleges or majors you want to study. Because at camp you became comfortable with your independence you can have a better idea of maybe what you want and what you think is best.
What if 20 years done the road no one talked face to face? Scary to think about, right? Today we already see it on a smaller scale. Look around. People are on their phones at restaurants instead of having small talk with the person across from them, or even at parties where it’s almost all about face-to-face communication. There is always a group of people sitting in the corner head knocked over and thumbs raptly going across the keyboard saying things like “I’m bored.” Of course you’re bored, you’re looking at a screen with pictures while a fun night is passing you by.
More and more kids are using social media and cellphones then ever before. In a survey done in 2012 by ORC International for the National Consumers League or (NCL) which is the nation’s oldest consumer organization. It shows that 10-11 age ranges is a “sweet spot” for pre-teens to receive a cell phone. Six out of 10 pre- teens were aged from 10-11 and then twenty percent of 8-9 year olds and 15% of 12 year olds received a cell phone. These age ranges are the same age of the girls I have camp and the percentages, we can assume jut keep going up each year. They use texting as a “cool thing” to do. They will text each other when they are right across from each other and think its funny. But this can become a potential problem. They use texting and the Internet as an alternative way to talk and they have developed poor communication skills because of it.
Camp allows these youngsters to unplug and reconnect with the nature and the world around them. At camps they don’t have access to cell phones or computers or any other technology really. This makes them talk face to face and realize that connections are the most personal when they are in the present moment. Countless times I remember girls coming in the first day practically crying when they gave their phones away thinking how will they survive? A few days into camp they realize they don’t need a phone to be complete. They have already made friends but just talking and having real time conversations. Camp is really the only place left that can do that.
At camp kids learn in a setting that is safe and nurturing. According to the ACA, parents trust camps because first and foremost they are kid centered places. What a camp does is all for a child. And camps make each camper feel special. While everything that goes on in the world especially with the increased social pressures kids have been burdened with, camp is a place to relieve them of these burdens. They can have a place to just be themselves. So that kid that didn’t have many friends at home because maybe his/her family isn’t as wealthy or maybe they are bullied at home because they are too short, too tall. Camp is a place that those kids can have a chance to grow. Camp can also helps kids succeed in something other than academics. Personally, I was not what people call an “excellent” student growing up, however, none of that mattered when I got to camp. I was passing leveling in archery, learning how to ride horses, and learning how to work well with others in a team. Camp did not judge me based on my school grades or based on anything for that matter. At camp kids can be whomever they want, and most of them choose to just be themselves for a change, and not have to worry about what they might be at home.
Recently, I asked my mom why she sent me to camp when it can cost a great deal to some. She said, “The cost didn’t matter to her. The cost was worth the experiences I got out of it. She knew I was having fun, and I looked forward to it each year. I made friends and each year, I’d come home more mature, and more knowledgeable about others and myself around me. That was something you couldn’t put a price tag on.” Going to summer camp has been a tradition in my family and others as well. I want to be able to send my children to camp in the future so they too can have these amazing opportunities and experiences. My fear though, is if parents do not understand that kids cannot learn everything in school and they need to have these outside encounters and have a chance to grow in a new environment. I hope this has persuaded all of you to understand how vital camp is to a child’s development and see how important that these kids have the chances to learn in new and unfamiliar environments.
I am nervous there are butterflies in my stomach, my nights are often sleepless and I start my days in great anticipation. It is almost time for camp! I have spent the whole year since the end of last August preparing for this. The stage is set and I eagerly anticipate the curtains opening.
The days become a blur with long hours both in the office and out on site. We are preparing, checking, double checking, chasing down information, finishing up the last projects and filling the waiting with work.
Even though I have done this many times it is always so new, so exciting and just a little nerve wracking. I will be met with a new audience while some faces are the same the mix is different. Will I recognize returning faces? Will the lake be warm? Will all run smoothly? Will the sun shine? Can we meet the promises that we have sold to families and to our new staff?
I am confident in Runoia’s ability to run smoothly like a well-oiled machine. We live for and store up our energy for this – the summer season when it truly is camp time. Maine is looking beautiful and ready for it’s summer campers and their families.
Bring it on it’s going to be awesome and we are going to totally make the Runoia dream team for 2015 a reality!
In the center of camp is a special place. Its hub endures the hustle and bustle of camp’s daily flow. We greet it with the pattering of feet as we fall out from flag raising and it shudders at the end of the day as milk gets spilled upon its floors and crackers crumble into happy mouths. We sing and fill the rafters with graces, bobos and birthday songs.
Where else besides cabins do we spend two and a half hours almost every day with an assorted group of random people? Where else could you find thousands of red and white flowered and plain squares? Like a silent movie, benches and chairs get moved in and out, up on top of tables and down again. It is only furniture but it’s furniture that fills its innards with substance and fortitude.
Probably the person who spent the most time within its screened walls was Johnny. For 54 summers Marion “Johnny” Johnson sat regally reigning from the corner by the flagpole. To date, some of her special sayings are shared in that very same corner. Betty’s Table became, and still is, an icon of good manners, quietly closing doors, trying new foods and cleaning plates. Counselors who return to camp for a couple years adopt their own table and create their own legacies with the campers who share meals around them.
Betty and Diane raised their newborn children under her eaves. Alex, K and other camp parents over the summers have done the same. Campers have laughed, cried, screamed, and shrieked with delight amidst the pine paneling. The hum of the water cooler adorned with the magically changing poster provides a watering hole for many. Each corner has its own echo, each it’s own feeling. Late night sardines has been played in all the nooks and crannies. Dances and casino halls, specialty restaurants and rainy day games have transformed her façade at times. Snacks, studying for JMG, package surprises, the mail bag, counselors’ coffee and board games have all been part of its personality. On its walls, some over 100 years old, banners and posters, signs and memorabilia hang to be seen by all. It is the epicenter of our daily sustenance, the Mother Ship of our excursions, the source of many good times and tastes.
By Kyleigh
A #Runoiagal – She is adventurous, but cautious. She is intelligent and she is full of inquisition. She loves to laugh. She likes to explore. She appreciates herself. She cares for the world and her family and friends.
In just a few short weeks, we are going to welcome “home” many experienced Runoia Gals and many new.
Together we will make magic happen!
Here is a poem written from one of the youngest campers this year at Runoia. She is beyond excited to come to camp and meet new friends, try new activities, gain autonomy in her physical and emotional abilities. And she is beyond excited to smell the moss and kiss the horses!
I thought I saw nothing…
But it might have been something.
I saw something blue,
But it could also be black
With big white clouds
All the blue connects
Big Beautiful sky!
Where birds fly everyday
I thought I saw nothing…
but it might have been something.
Trees swaying in the wind
The wind smells like the moss and flowers
I am the forest!
Big beautiful forest!
Where birds rest in nests every day.
Here is to all the Runoia Gals that ever have been and ever will be!
Imagine yourself eight years old; you are at sleepaway camp, far far far from your family. You are taking in the fun and action that happens day-in day-out at camp.
One day, as you merrily cruise along in your eight year old world, you are invited to go camping to “Fairy Ring”. Wait, it gets better. Not only do you get to camp at Fairy Ring, you get to have magical s’mores (AKA dessert before dinner) and you spend part of your afternoon building fairy houses for the fairies of Fairy Ring.
Consider your eight year old mind fathoming a camp out where the fairies actually live? When said fairies come to visit before bedtime, you can hardly believe your eyes. Flitting between tall pines and the evening dusk, a movement, a glow, a fairy appears!
The very next morning, when you wake up, the fairies have left you with your very own fairy rock painted in bright colors and glittery-gold.
This tradition at Camp Runoia has been going on since the beginning of time!
Perfect Harmony
This week is concert week for the chorus that I am a member of. It means two nights of rehearsal and two performances which equals a lot of singing. I love being part of a group of women that spends time together making music. We are not professional musicians but spend time and effort learning notes, exploring musical nuances and perfecting our performance. For 2 ½ hours a week I become lost in the complexity of music mastery and the production of choral sound.
At camp singing is a large part of our everyday lives. We sing silly songs, rowdy songs, quiet, contemplative melodies and most importantly we sing our Runoia songs. We spend time at Assembly learning songs; some have been sung for generations and others are new to Runoia. Old songs carry our history. Hearing them reminds us of our special place on Great Pond. We find ourselves humming Runoia tunes when we are far from camp and know that many of our alumnae sing them to their own children as lullabies.
Our camp songs have actions, guitar accompaniments, nonsense words, no words, harmonies, different parts or barely a tune. We make songs up to popular tunes, we lip sync, we cry while we sing: sometimes from laughing and sometimes because it is our last time of the season singing together.
At camp it is not the quality or musicality that matters so much although we do channel our inner Diane Smith and try to hit those odd high notes in Tumbledown and It’s Blue and White! It is more that we do something together. We can be heard singing in the Lodge, Dining Hall, around the campfire, in a sail boat or canoe, down the path to the waterfront, out on the hiking trails, for the camp Talent Show and in the vans. Songs are a unique part of our camp culture that we pass along orally and through our song book.
Songs and singing make us happy! Music has the ability to unite us. We may not always sing in perfect harmony but we sing together to celebrate our community, traditions and just because we can! It is part of who we are at Runoia it is our ‘Harmony’.
Listen to a few favorite Runoia songs here!
As I sit and listen to the wind bring in the sound of the peepers through the open window, I am reminded of how special this time of year is. It is mother’s day. And the world around me is bustling with life and new energy. Today I saw the red robins moving with intent and determination to build nests, I watched a hawk fly with such grace and glory from tree to tree. I see the red and the gray squirrels moving and collecting bounty. The world has awakened from the quiet hibernation of winter and the white stark horizon is now 30 shades of green. It is spring and it is a celebration of life.
Being a mother is my greatest accomplishment. I reflect on this day that it is not actually a celebration of my work, but that of my children.
It is their momentum and their exploration that feed my soul. Spring is also a time of change, and as with all growth there is change.
Chris and I are embarking with our family on great adventure. Our commitment to join the Runoia family is beyond exciting! We are determined and dedicated to bring our enthusiasm to camp and offer our love, our life, our experience, our connection, our intent, our passion, and our good will to Great Pond. We could not be more thrilled to travel to Maine with our beautiful children and share some of the greatest experiences that we could dream of with your daughters!
We promise to be kind, gentle, honest, and to encourage them to find the best of themselves. We support growth and experience. There is so much that the land and the programs at Runoia will teach us all this summer! And as spring blooms with life and spiritual awakening, I resonate with E.E. Cumming’s words “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”
At Runoia we encourage and support what spring begins in growth all summer
long. My wish is that as you send your daughters from your nest to our woods, that we provide them with the safety and comfort, courage and the wisdom, the strength and the bravery, to expand their physical and emotional skills to their full potential, becoming exceptional young women.
Happy Mother’s Day. Happy Spring.
Find out more about Kyleigh and Chris Mercier here.
